And no, it’s not about getting busy in the bedroom…
A relationship expert has brought attention to a surprisingly simple yet powerful way to build a stronger and healthier bond between partners.
And to clear things up—this isn’t about sex.
With the daily chaos of work, parenting, and endless scrolling through social media, couples often find that emotional and physical closeness slowly gets pushed to the side. Those small intimate moments can start to fade without anyone even noticing.
Lots of people think intimacy means grand, romantic gestures—like planning fancy dinners, surprising your partner with a trip, or buying expensive gifts. But according to experts, the kind of connection that truly keeps a relationship strong is actually much more down-to-earth. Just like J.Lo said, love doesn’t have to come with a price tag.
Instead, it’s the little things—those everyday moments of closeness that matter just as much. Mariah Freya, who specializes in sex education, says couples should focus more on kissing.
It seems Doja Cat and SZA were onto something with their song ‘Kiss Me More.’ Freya agrees especially if your relationship feels like it’s losing its spark, kissing more might just be the thing to bring it back.
Kiss your partner more
Jonathan Knowles / Getty
“Kissing is the most underrated relationship tool.” she told MailOnline. “Couples obsess over date nights, whether they’re having ‘enough’ sex, and communication techniques, but they’re sleeping on the one thing that actually predicts whether they’ll stay happy together.”
There was a 2019 study that looked into the emotional effects of kissing. It found that sharing a kiss can release chemicals like oxytocin, serotonin, and dopamine—those are the ones that make us feel good. These chemicals help reduce stress and increase feelings of pleasure.
Then in 2022, another study revealed that couples who kissed more often experienced better emotional health. Their relationships were described as more satisfying overall, which shows how meaningful this simple act can be.
But even with all the benefits, it seems many couples aren’t kissing nearly enough. A 2011 survey showed that almost one in five married couples could go an entire week without even sharing a kiss. And when they finally do, the kiss usually lasts no more than five seconds.
Kissing has a number of benefits
Tim Macpherson / Getty
According to another relationship expert, a lack of affection, especially things like kissing can be one of the key warning signs to watch out for in a relationship.
Psychotherapist and relationship expert Kathy McCoy explained that couples who get too comfortable often stop making small efforts. But those little habits, like kissing, holding hands, hugging, or even sharing inside jokes are essential for keeping the bond alive.
Her research suggests that finding happiness in both everyday routines and big moments plays a big role in keeping relationships strong. And when those moments disappear, so does the connection.
When it comes to showing appreciation, some couples can fall into a pattern of focusing only on what’s wrong. That might mean blaming each other, criticizing more often than complimenting, or constantly pointing out flaws.
McCoy stressed that in healthy relationships, people feel safe and supported. They trust that their partner sees the best in them—even if they’re not perfect all the time.
So if it’s been a while since you kissed your partner, maybe it’s time to lean in. A quick kiss might seem small, but it could make a big difference in how connected you feel.